It has been a challenging few weeks for me.

Last week, Sarah and Brett were here which was awesome.  But then they left, which was not so awesome.  Every time a family member comes to visit and then leaves, I am reminded of how far away I live from the rest of my family and I always sort of get into a slump.

Then, remember how I mentioned an interview that I had a couple of weeks ago?  Well, to make a long story short, I was asked back for two more interviews after that one. I made it to the final round, and was really excited about the potential new opportunity.  And then, found out about a week after the final interview, that I did not get the job.  I was really upset.  I try not to take these things personally, but it’s really difficult for me.  I keep going over everything in my head and asking myself what I did wrong, what I could have done better.  And, as I was given no feedback, I just don’t know.  But as S and my dad tells me (and they are right), I might not have done anything wrong.  It just wasn’t the right job.  I wasn’t the right candidate, it wasn’t a good match, it wasn’t meant to be.  There could have been one candidate with just a little more experience, or one who answered one question differently.  That’s it.

So I began moving on.  Getting back up.  And then… two days later (on Friday), S comes home from work and (fearfully) tells me that the exact same company just contacted him to interview for some potential opportunities.  Now, tell me that’s not crushing.  Of course, it is completely unrelated to any interaction or potential opportunities I had with that company.  But still.  The past 27 years of my life, I wouldn’t have cared if this company contacted S on any given day.  In fact, I would have celebrated, because he would really like to work for them.  But of all days, it had to come two days after I got rejected.  Can you believe it?

My rational side understands that the two are completely unrelated and that I should not be anything but completely excited for S.  And I definitely am excited for him – anything that is good for him is good for us and I want him to be happy.  But that doesn’t mean I didn’t cry my eyes out pretty much the entire evening on Friday.

I was so upset that evening, I didn’t even think about dinner.  That in and of itself should show you the extent of my sadness.  But if you need further proof… S volunteered to make dinner.  Not only did he volunteer, but he insisted.  He made me a lovely salad with romaine, broccoli, ham, cheese, and hummus.  I didn’t take a picture, but it did make me feel better

Another thing that made me feel better was the package that I received from the generous people at POM.  I know, it’s crazy… but I have never tried POM (or any pomegranate juice, for that matter.)  So when they contacted me and offered some, I was very excited!

When the box arrived, JB was excited too.

Inside….

It was delicious!  I downed almost an entire bottle as soon as I opened it.

And knowing it is so healthy – full of antioxidants and good stuff!!

From their website:

POM Wonderful 100% Pomegranate Juice and POMx are full of antioxidants called phytochemicals. Phytochemicals protect plants from harmful elements in the environment, like ultraviolet radiation and pests. They also provide plants with their sensory characteristics such as color, flavor and smell.

I feel healthier already.  I can’t wait to drink the rest of it and to try some recipes!  THANK YOU, Pom peeps!

Ok, but back to the whole get knocked down, get back up thing.  So Friday and Saturday I worked mentally to get back up from yet another job knockdown.  Then Saturday morning I went to go pick up my new motorcycle wheels.  My bike needed new tires, and rather than paying somebody $150 to put them on for me (as well as paying for the new tires), we did a big part of it ourselves.  We bought the tires online, and they arrived at the house last week.  S had previously bought a front and rear wheel motorcycle stand, so we put the bike up and took off the wheels in the garage.  Then, we took the wheels and the new tires to a motorcycle shop in San Jose, where they put the new tires on for me.   Then Saturday we picked them up, took them home, and put them back on the bike!  So by just doing a little bit of the work ourselves, we saved over $100.  Plus, I got to learn about my bike and how to take the wheels off.  And S does this kind of stuff for fun anyways.  It was a win/win all around.

I was really excited to ride my bike with the new tires.  I got on it and S got on his, and we went around the neighborhood a few times.  I was doing great!  I only stayed on side streets, but was feeling good and confident and just having fun.  I was headed back to the house, and stopped at a stop sign about to turn onto our street.  When the path was clear, I started to pull out… and stalled.  I wasn’t expecting that, of course, and couldn’t put my feet down in time to catch the bike… and dropped it.  This was the first time I have actually dropped the bike in the street… and kind of a busy street.  Besides the fact that it hurt and I was worried about my bike, it was totally embarrassing!  Several people who were outside were staring, and some cars stopped to make sure I was ok.  S helped me up, and I got back on the bike and rode back to the house.

After that, I was a little shaken up but was determined to get back on and keep trying.  S thought it was time to go out onto the busy street, he suggested that we drive to Los Gatos to get some coffee.  I was so scared.  It’s a really busy street, and having cars all around me is still unnerving since I’m not 100% confident in my newbie skills.  Plus, I clearly still have problems with dropping the bike… and if I drop it on a major street I could cause an accident or get run over.  I finally agreed to do it.  I thought, I am going to have to get on that street to go anywhere… I will have to do it eventually and by riding on these back streets I am never going to feel “ready”.  I just have to do it.

So, scared out of my  mind, I got on the bike.  We started up, and went to pull out of the driveway.  When the coast was clear, I pulled out and made a sharp right onto the street.  Too sharp.  And dropped the bike.  On the right side, this time.  With more cars, and more people around.  This time, more people stopped.  I also hit my head really hard… I had never fallen to the right before.  S had to quickly jump off his bike and move my bike out of the street, because the traffic was building up.  It was horrible.

After that, I was done for the day.  I was petrified to get back on the bike, and there was not a snowball’s chance in hell I was thinking about going on the main road.  I was sad, embarrassed, and after spending the night before and the morning trying to mentally psych myself up after the job rejection and S’s subsequent contact, I was ready to crawl into the fetal position on the floor of my garage.

But S wouldn’t let me.  Have I mentioned lately how much I love this man?  He put my bike back in the garage, and then we got on his and went to get a cup of coffee.  And the combination of S and coffee helped lift my spirits.

I’m done for today.  But tomorrow, I will get back on the bike.  I will ride around the neighborhood, and I will try (keyword:  try…) to get confident enough to go on the main street.  Because I get knocked down, and sometimes I cry, but I’ll get back up.